The most hilarious job application

WARNING: This may be a hoax or a wind up. Either way, it’ll crack a few of your ribs.
Old B&Q greeter
B&Q JOB APPLICATIONThis is an actual job application that a 75-year-old pensioner submitted to B&Q in Tunbridge Wells.

They hired him because he was so funny….

NAME: Kenneth Way (Grumpy Bastard)

SEX: Not lately, but 1 am looking for the right woman (or at least one who will cooperate)

DESIRED POSITION: Company’s Chief Executive or Managing Director. But seriously, whatever’s available.

If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying in the first place – would I?

DESIRED SALARY: £150,000 a year plus share options and a Tony Blair style redundancy package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

PREVIOUS SALARY: A lot less than I’m worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

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